We all have bad habits that are hard to break, however, some are more toxic than others. Whether you’re on the dating scene or just looking to make some new friends, there’s a good chance that one of the people you come across is a pathological liar. The good news is that some super easy ways to spot one—read on to so you can stay far away.
1. They lie about a broad range of topics.
If someone is an occasional fibber, they’ll most likely be deceitful only about a few specific topics and only out of desperation. However, a pathological liar will be much less discriminatory about what they choose to be dishonest about. If they have an ongoing habit of lying, they will find it easy to lie about a broad range of subjects without too much concern for what they are.
2. They lie about trivial things.
Pathological liars live by the ability to lie. This is why they lie about not only the big things in life but also the small things. It’s like they have a compulsion. It could be as small as what they ate for dinner last night or as big as where they’re from—they don’t differentiate.
3. They aren’t worried about getting caught.
For most people, one of their biggest concerns when lying is being found out. Because we don’t lie often, the guilt of having deceived someone weighs heavily on us, and we’re constantly wondering when the jig will be up. Pathological liars don’t have this issue. The risk of getting caught in a lie isn’t enough for them to stop.
4. They experience a rush when they get away with a lie.
Not only are pathological liars not worried about getting caught, but they get something out of being deceitful. Studies show that pathological liars often are dealing with an underlying mental health issue, resulting in the compulsion to lie that results in a feeling of euphoria. Some lie just to experience this feeling.
5. They continue to lie even when confronted.
While some pathological liars will admit defeat when found out for one of their lies, others will continue to fib. Because they don’t feel guilt about lying in the first place and aren’t worried about being caught, there’s no incentive for them to come clean. This makes it difficult to know where one lie ends and another begins.
6. They offer up unnecessary details.
One of the easiest ways to spot a pathological liar is in the details of their stories. If someone is telling the truth, they’re usually concise and stick to the facts—it doesn’t take long. However, a pathological liar will go into great detail, injecting many different twists and turns, compensating for the fact that they’re being dishonest.
7. They are consistently changing details in their story.
If a pathological liar tells you a story and then you overhear the same story the next day, there’s a good chance it’s going to be slightly different. The main points might still be there, but they will have changed little snippets. This is because it’s difficult for them to keep track of their lies.
8. They get defensive when being questioned.
Pathological lying is impulsive, which leads to extremely resistant behavior. If you confront a pathological liar about a story they’ve told where they were dishonest, they will get defensive. They will accuse you of being crazy, not trusting them, and get angry at your “audacity” to confront them in the first place. These are all signs that they’re not being honest.
9. Their responses are vague, and they avoid questions.
When you do confront a pathological liar about a lie that they’ve told, you aren’t going to get a straightforward answer. They will try to dodge your direct questions as much as possible, and if they do give an answer, it will be vague.
10. You recall events differently than they do.
Another trait that pathological liars often carry is the tendency to gaslight those around them. When you try to recall a memory with a pathological liar, they’ll usually accuse you of not remembering it right and making things up. They’re so convincing that you might actually start to believe them.
11. What they say and what they do are different.
Things are often easier said than done, and this is especially true for a pathological liar. An easy way to spot one is to see how often their actions match their words. If they constantly promise things and do not follow through on them, they’re being dishonest about their intentions.
12. They claim one of your stories as their own.
If you suspect someone of being a pathological liar, you might have experienced this. You tell them something that happened to you in confidence, and then, to your amazement, they retell the story in your presence to someone else—but they claim that the story is theirs. Pathological liars emulate people and take on character traits to be more convincing.
13. You have a gut feeling that they’re lying to you.
There are many ways to tell if someone is a pathological liar, including your intuition. It’s always worth trusting your gut, even if you know that confronting the liar could have negative consequences for you.
14. They’re anxious when they talk to you.
An honest person will be cool, calm, and collected when talking to you. A pathological liar might have a good poker face, but their body language will give them away. They might be bouncing their leg up and down, or maybe they’re sweating slightly.
15. They’re dramatic with their narratives.
One thing pathological liars love to do is embellish their stories. They’re already lying, so why not make the most of it? While you might not pick up on this initially, you’ll realize that whenever they tell you about something, they always seem to choose the most exaggerated version of that narrative.
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