1. You Live for Approval and Praise
If you’re always seeking validation and approval from others it’s a clear sign you lack a sense of self. When you don’t listen to your gut or trust your judgment, relying on someone else to lead and make the decisions you aren’t living authentically.
2. You Fear Being a Disappointment
There’s no such thing as the perfect person, and failure and disappointment are part of life and how we learn and grow. If you live in a constant state of fear about disappointing others, and compromise your desires and happiness, you are trying to live up to someone else’s expectations.
3. You Follow a Script
If your life feels scripted or you are following a predetermined path set by your parents, partner, or societal expectations, you aren’t being true to yourself. When you ignore your needs and inner voice and blindly follow what others tell you is best for you you are living life on their terms.
4. You Lack Drive and Passion
If your life or career feels empty and meaningless and you lack the energy and drive to make changes you are walking around asleep. Unfulfilled passions, dreams, and a lack of enthusiasm for the activities and career path you’re currently on are your inner voice telling you to wake up and get real.
5. You Are Over Committed
Keeping busy to avoid having a good look in your own backyard could be a sign your life isn’t making you happy or is not your own. If you over-schedule and take on more responsibilities and commitments than you can handle to please others or win their approval that should tell you everything.
6. You Feel Lost and Can’t Make a Decision
A sign you are trying to live up to someone else’s standards or expectations is feeling lost and confused about your own identity and purpose. This lack of self-worth can leave you paralyzed when it comes to making decisions and you will defer to someone else about what you should do.
7. You Feel Trapped
Feeling like you are following a script or living a life designed by someone else can make you feel trapped and stifled. When you sense that you aren’t following your path or pursuing your own life, relationship, and career dreams, you can feel disillusioned, unhappy, and depressed.
8. You Sacrificed Your Dreams
A sure sign you are not living the life you want is you suppressed and sacrificed your personal goals and dreams to live up to someone’s expectations of you. Not honoring your own needs and desires can eat you up inside and make you feel resentful and unhappy.
9. You Have No Self-Worth
If your confidence and self-worth are heavily influenced by how people treat you and whether you live up to their standards and expectations you have a serious problem. You matter and it’s important to have a strong sense of self-worth otherwise people will walk all over you and if you allow that, they will have even less respect for you.
10. You Are Burned Out
It can be exhausting and depressing to sacrifice your own happiness and mental well-being to meet the expectations and needs of others. Not living authentically and taking on too much to please others can lead to stress, burnout, and even a breakdown if you’re not careful.
11. You Are a People Pleaser
When you have low self-esteem and low self-worth you want to blend in and follow the crowd. This can make you a people pleaser, meaning you will agree to or accept whatever someone says or does just to fit in and be accepted. When you act this way you aren’t living authentically or being true to your own personality and needs.
12. You Are Risk Adverse
It’s OK to be naturally cautious and even a little risk-averse but if the thought of stepping outside your comfort zone or challenging the status quo fills you with fear, something is wrong. If you don’t make the changes you want to, especially the ones that could lead to personal growth or increased happiness because you fear upsetting others or sense their disapproval you are not living your own life.
13. You Envy Others
If you spend your life feeling envious of other people and their lives your inner voice is telling you that you aren’t happy in yours. Feeling envy of people who are free to live their life on their terms, and pursue their own passions without worrying about others’ opinions is a sign you aren’t free to live yours and that needs to change.
14. You Don’t Have Any Goals
If you never think about or imagine your future and don’t have any clear personal goals or aspirations that should tell you everything. When your actions and choices are driven by the desire to follow a path set by someone else and receive praise and recognition for doing so, you are stuck in a life without purpose.
15. You Feel Angry
You can suppress your emotions and silence your inner voice but frustration will build and resentment could bubble over into anger one day. You only have one life so if you fear you are not living the one you want and feel burdened by having to live up to someone’s expectations of you, work through this with a therapist. Once you identify your behaviors and what is fueling them you can set yourself free and reclaim your sense of self and life.
