When spotting an authentic person, actions are obviously more important than words. That said, don’t skip over the words someone says because they’ll give you tons of information about where the person stands and whether they’re real or not. Here are 15 phrases to spot in conversations with men which will show you that they’re not going to lie or fake it with you.
1. “I’m not sure.”
Enough with the mansplainers! Isn’t it so refreshing to meet a guy who doesn’t behave like they know everything about every topic under the sun? When a man says “I’m not sure about that” or “I don’t know,” it’s a good sign that he’s humble. He’d rather be honest about his lack of knowledge on a subject, instead of making a fool of himself by faking it or coming across as arrogant.
2. “I’m sorry.”
If a man is capable of apologizing to you when he’s done something out of line, that’s a huge sign that he’s honest and can be trusted, Mark Manson notes. He’s unafraid to step up and take accountability for his mistakes, which prevents him from trying to shift the blame onto others or play the victim. Saying he’s sorry also shows that he’s willing to work through any relationship issues.
3. “You’re right.”
It takes a strong, confident man to tell you that you were right and they were wrong. Some people avoid doing this because they always want to curate a flawless self-image in public. By being honest with you and letting you take the win, it shows that this guy’s down-to-earth and eager to form real connections instead of competing with others to come out on top. He knows winning isn’t everything!
4. “I need some help.”
It’s a myth to think that asking others for support when you’re stressed out is a sign of weakness. Men who are honest and genuine will be open about their feelings. If they’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed, they’ll let you know instead of trying to be macho, which is so over. When they reach out for help, it makes you respect them and their limitations more.
5. “Thank you so much.”
If someone can’t give you a simple “thank you” when you do something nice for them, it’s a red flag that they’re arrogant and selfish. By comparison, an honest and decent man will be quick to show you gratitude. He’s clearly been raised right, while showing that he won’t shy away from making you feel valued. A guy like this won’t take you for granted.
6. “What do you think about this?”
If someone asks you for your opinion or advice, it’s always a good sign that they value what you have to say. They’re open to collaborating with others instead of thinking that they know everything. Whether in the workplace or home, this is a sign that a guy’s honest because he’s empathetic, wanting to understand your feelings on issues and situations.
7. “Let’s agree to disagree.”
Someone who wants to convince you to adopt their point of view or opinion can sometimes come across as manipulative or arrogant, thinking they know best. By comparison, a guy who says, “Let’s agree to disagree” shows that he’s more chilled. He doesn’t need to try to be victorious during every argument or control you. He’d rather prioritize peace and respect in the relationship.
8. “Are you really okay?”
When you tell a guy you’re dating that you’re fine even though you’re not, it’s amazing when he asks, “Are you really okay?” It shows that he reads your body language cues and is empathetic. He wants to dig deeper into your feelings and ensure that you’re in a good emotional state. This phrase shows that the really cares, instead of just asking how you are as a lukewarm pleasantry.
9. “Do you need any help?”
This is one of the biggest signs that someone’s genuine and respectful. Instead of jumping in and helping you with a task, which can feel arrogant and rude, asking if you require any help shows that they’re respectful of what you’re doing. However, they’re also letting you know that they’re ready and willing to help you if you choose to take them up on the offer.
10. “Let’s talk about it.”
If you’re having an argument with someone, or you’re unhappy about something they’ve done, it’s a relief when they say, “Let’s talk about it.” This shows that they’re willing to compromise while respecting what you think and feel. An honest man will tell you this phrase in an attempt to clear the air and resolve your relationship issues, instead of hiding from them.
11. “I’m happy for you.”
When someone gives you a genuine compliment and kudos for achieving a goal, it’s a sign that they’re genuine and compassionate. They care about you and want you to succeed, which is a show of emotional support, according to Healthline. Instead of being competitive with you by trying to one-up you, or belittling your achievements because of their low self-esteem, they are warm and caring.
12. “I understand what you mean.”
When a man takes the time to pay attention to what you have to say and tells you that they understand where you’re coming from, it displays their empathy. They’re showing that they’ve been actively listening, while trying to connect with you on an emotional level. This builds trust. They’re also validating your opinions, which is a hallmark of honesty because it acknowledges your experience without judgment.
13. “No.”
A man who says “no” to requests or favors tends to come across as assertive. He’s also honest because he’s not being super-agreeable by going along with what others want, which is fake. Instead, he knows himself and what he needs. Setting boundaries is a sign that someone is genuine. With them, you always know where you stand, and they don’t give you mixed messages.
14. “I value you.”
When someone tells you that they value you, they’re recognizing your worth and showing appreciation for who you are. This conveys a deep level of gratitude and respect. It’s also emotionally honest. By being transparent with their feelings, they show they’re not afraid to be authentic and vulnerable.
15. “Tell me more.”
Honest people are willing to listen to others and learn more about the world. By asking you for more information about what you’re talking about, they’re seeking clarity and showing curiosity, both of which build a genuine connection. “Tell me more” is also a key phrase displaying active listening, showing that they’re engaged in the conversation and fostering trust. In addition, asking for more information helps them to avoid misunderstandings.