Conflict keeps relationships interesting and therapists in business. While everyone has their own unique way of dealing with disagreements, there are some classic moves that many women tend to reach for when the going gets tough. Do you do any of these things?
1. She’ll get overwhelmed emotionally
Picture this: You forgot to take out the trash (again), and suddenly you’re drowning in a sea of feelings about every chore you’ve missed since 2015. Spoiler alert: this isn’t just about the trash. It’s an attempt to connect emotionally and be understood. It’s like saying, “Hey, can we talk about how this makes me feel?” but with more…intensity.
2. She’ll call her BFF
When conflict hits, some women speed-dial their friends. It’s not gossip, it’s a support system (on steroids). There’s actually science behind this—researchers call this the “tend-and-befriend” response. It’s like “fight-or-flight,” but with more hugs and possibly wine (and snacks). Nothing beats a good vent session with your ride-or-die crew. Plus, it’s cheaper than therapy!
3. She’ll spout off the facts
Why feel when you can fact? Some women turn into walking encyclopedias during conflicts, armed with statistics, historical precedents, and maybe a PowerPoint presentation. This one is all about creating emotional distance. Can’t argue with facts, right? (Spoiler: You totally can.) While his technique works great in debates it might leave your partner feeling like they’re dating Siri.
4. She’ll people-please to her own detriment
“No, no, it’s fine that you want to spend our anniversary with your buddies. I’ll just be here, alphabetizing the spice rack and definitely not crying into my Ben & Jerry’s.” This one’s a tightrope walk between keeping the peace and slowly dying inside. The catch: Eventually, you run out of “pleases” to give. And Ben & Jerry’s.
5. She’ll use the mirroring technique
“I’m not jealous, YOU’RE jealous!” Ah, the classic “I know you are, but what am I?” of the adult world. The lowdown: This is projection, where we see our own issues reflected in others like some funky psychological mirror ball. The irony? Sometimes, the person you’re really arguing with is yourself. Plot twist!
6. She’ll displace her anger
Boss made you cry? Time to pick a fight with your unsuspecting partner about leaving dishes in the sink! This is displacement in action. It’s like emotional musical chairs and the feeling has to land somewhere when the music stops. Silver lining: At least the dishes might finally get done?
7. She’ll turn into a stand-up comic
Some women could give comedians a run for their money during conflicts. Suddenly, everything’s a punchline, including their feelings. Behind the laughter, though? It’s a stress reliever but sometimes, if over-done, the joke ends up being on you.
8. She’ll be silent
This is the art of saying everything without saying anything at all. Think icy stares, exaggerated sighs, and doors that mysteriously slam themselves. It’s like a one-woman show of “Guess Why I’m Mad: The Musical.” Word of advice: Mind-reading is not a widespread skill. Use with caution.
9. She’ll act like an ostrich
If I can’t see conflict, it doesn’t exist! promptly buries head in sand This is denial in its purest form. Sure, ignorance is bliss—that is until you try to stand up and realize you’re still neck-deep in sand. Pro tip: Make sure to come up for air occasionally. Reality misses you!
10. She’ll compartmentalize as much as possible 
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“Work stress? Let me just slot that into my ‘Ignore Until Vacation’ brain compartment. Relationship issues? That fits nicely in the ‘Deal With After Binge-Watching Netflix’ slot.” This is compartmentalization and it comes with a risk. Eventually, you run out of mental storage space.
11. She’ll go hard on a hobby
Argument with your partner? Time to train for that marathon you’ve been putting off for years! This is sublimation in action. It’s like your brain decided to trade in your stress ball for a pair of running shoes. You might not solve your problems, but hey, at least you’ll have great calves!
12. She’ll regress big time
“I’m not arguing with you! You’re not the boss of me!” crosses arms and pouts This is regression, where adulting becomes optional and you revert to your teenage (or toddler) self. Word of caution: Cute as it may be, it’s less charming when you’re 35 and throwing a tantrum in the cereal aisle.
13. She’ll put on rose-colored glasses
“Sure, he forgot our anniversary, but remember that time he held the door open for me? He’s basically Prince Charming!” This is idealization cranked up to eleven. Eventually, those glasses come off, and the high-definition reality can be a bit of a shock.
14. She’ll do some time traveling
“This argument reminds me of the time in third grade when…” This is displacement in time, focusing on past events to avoid present issues. It’s like having a PhD in History of Personal Grievances. Pro tip: Nostalgia is great, but maybe save the trip down memory lane for less heated moments?
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