While you might think gossiping isn’t a big deal as long as it’s shared with someone you’re close to, you could be fooling yourself. If you’re always gossiping, you could be getting a bad reputation, even with your closest friends. Here are 15 signs that your gossiping habit is getting out of control and harming you.
1. You roll your eyes when someone tells you the gossip they heard.
Why wouldn’t you be interested in hearing the latest goss? There’s only one reason – you already know all about it! As someone who’s got their finger on the pulse of the grapevine, you know everything about everyone.
2. You get excited about new gossip.
When you hear something juicy about someone, you experience a bit of a high from it. It’s like the gossip has caused a flood of endorphins through your body (according to Science Reports, this is actually a thing), which is pretty addictive. Could be time to get your blood pumping in a healthier way!
3. You seem dramatic when you call people to gossip.
You can’t wait to share the gossip you’ve heard! It gets to the point that you’re so excited, that your friends think there’s some emergency because you’re breathless and screaming. Yikes. When they find out that it’s gossip you want to share, they might be weirded out.
4. You stalk people on social media.
Maybe one of the ways in which you stay updated about the latest gossip is by stalking people on social media. But, if anyone discovers your dirty secret, you might feel embarrassed. Social media stalking brings you down by making you feel jealous or triggering comparisons with others.
5. You’re always the first to know stuff.
While you might feel an ego boost when someone at the office or in your social circle runs to you to share the latest news, this is actually a bad sign. People know how much you love to gossip, so your bad reputation is why they’re coming to you first.
6. You feel better than the person you’re gossiping about.
According to Psychology Today, gossip can easily turn toxic, like when you only share gossip about someone else because it makes you feel superior. This may give you a confidence boost, but it’s petty and shows people your low self-esteem.
7. You can’t keep any secrets.
Your friend confides in you about her toxic boyfriend or lousy frenemy and says you can’t tell a soul about it. You lie and say you won’t, but the second the conversation’s over, you’re calling someone to spill your guts. You’re risking your friendships and betraying your loved one’s trust.
8. You don’t pay attention to what people tell you.
Your love of gossip can make you a bad listener. When someone’s confiding in you about their problems or secrets, instead of engaging with them and listening, you’re thinking about who to tell about it!
9. You only share negative gossip.
If you’re choosing to share negative, hurtful gossip about people instead of their successes and good news, this is toxic. People will start to see you as someone who’s trying to spread negativity, which is off-putting.
10. You don’t share any gossip about yourself.
When something negative happens to you, you work hard to keep it under wraps because you don’t want people to judge you. Yet, you’re quick to share other people’s bad days. You’re hoping to be seen as perfect, but gossip isn’t helping you with that!
11. You’re not empathetic.
One of the biggest problems with gossip is that it can make you less empathetic. You’re not seeing how rumors can hurt the target of your cruel gossip. It’s a good idea to put yourself in other people’s shoes and imagine how you’d feel if people were talking about you behind your back.
12. You share personal, private information.
If you see no problem with sharing other people’s personal and private information, this can wreck your reputation. People will think you lack respect for others, which can have serious consequences in your life, like causing you to lose a job or relationship.
13. You use gossip to try to get others on your side.
You might use gossiping about others to get people on your side. So, if you’re engaging in conflict with someone, you might try to get your mutual friends to support you and see things from your perspective by gossiping about your frenemy.
14. You eavesdrop on other’s conversations.
If you’ve been trying to get information about others to gossip about them, you might see nothing wrong in eavesdropping on other people’s conversations. It’s disrespectful, and eavesdropping makes it easy to misunderstand what’s being said or take it out of context.
15. You struggle to talk about anything else.
If your gossiping is causing you to become obsessed with sharing secrets, you might struggle to find other things to talk about when hanging out with friends. You’re so concerned with gossip that it’s taking up your mental space and time that could be used for more meaningful things.
