According to Verywell Mind, we often tell white lies or half-truths to avoid conflict, protect feelings, or maintain social appearances. However, these seemingly harmless deceptions can chip away at the trust and authenticity of our relationships. Here are 15 common lies we tell each other and why we should reconsider this habit.
1. “I’m fine.”
If you’ve ever said this phrase, then you likely know how untruthful it is. According to Psychology Today, people use this to deflect their feelings when they don’t want to cause conflict. It’s a shorthand that can mask anything from minor annoyances to serious emotional distress.
Why you should stop: By consistently saying you’re fine when you’re not, you miss opportunities for genuine support and connection. It can lead to emotional isolation and prevent you from addressing real, underlying issues.
2. “I’ll be there in 5 minutes.”
If you haven’t said this, then you know at least one person who has. We all underestimate how long it takes to get somewhere and our ability to get ready, which leads to this common white lie.
Why you should stop: Being chronically late is not only disrespectful towards others’ time but it also makes you untrustworthy. Being honest about your ETA allows others to plan accordingly and shows you’re reliable.
3. “I love your new haircut/outfit/etc.”
Oh, the false compliment! A tried and true lie. Even if we don’t genuinely like the chance, we offer this up as a way to be polite or avoid hurting someone’s feelings.
Why you should stop: While well-intentioned, false compliments can backfire if the other person senses you’re being insincere. It’s better to find something genuine to compliment or offer constructive feedback if asked.
4. “I didn’t see your message/call.”
You may not want to explain why you didn’t respond to communication, like that you were just too tired. So instead, you use this convenient and hard-to-fact-check lie.
Why you should stop: It breaks trust over time, especially if it’s used frequently. Being honest about why you didn’t respond (e.g., “I saw it but got distracted”) shows respect and accountability.
5. “It’s not you, it’s me.”
This cliché is mostly used when ending relationships to soften the blow of rejection. But it doesn’t make it feel any better.
Why you should stop: It’s often transparent and can prevent honest communication about relationship issues. Providing specific, constructive feedback (when appropriate) can be more helpful for both you and the other person to grow.
6. “I’m listening.”
Have you ever been on the phone with someone and told them you were listening, but in reality, you were doing the dishes, texting, scrolling social media, and putting on deodorant simultaneously? If you’re nodding yes, then you’re guilty of telling a very common lie.
Why you should stop: It’s just straight-up, not nice, and can make the person speaking feel unimportant. It’s more respectful to ask for a second to finish what you’re doing or call them back when you can give your full attention.
7. “I didn’t have too much to drink.”
It’s so funny when people downplay their alcohol consumption to avoid judgment or concern from others—sorry, but you’re not fooling anyone!
Why you should stop: This can be dangerous, and it can also lead to poor decision-making, like driving or drinking even more. Being honest about your limits is responsible and can prevent more dangerous situations from happening.
8. “I’m happy for you.”
We’ve all told someone through gritted teeth that we were so happy for them even when were envious or resentful of someone else’s success.
Why you should stop: While politeness has its place, consistently suppressing negative feelings can lead to resentment. You can find ways to genuinely celebrate others while acknowledging your feelings, and that will lead to more authentic relationships.
9. “I don’t mind.”
If you’re saying this, it’s because you like to avoid conflict even when something does bother you.
Why you should stop: Not only can this lead to resentment, but it can also lead to miscommunication in relationships. Being honest about your preferences and boundaries, even with the small stuff, makes for healthier interactions.
10. “I forgot.”
Oh, did your dog eat your homework, too? This is a common lie that is used as a crutch and honestly—no one’s buying it.
Why you should stop: Overuse of this excuse chips away at your trust and reliability. Take responsibility for your actions and priorities and what you’ve chosen to prioritize, it’s way more productive and respectful.
11. “I’m working on it.”
Maybe you’re not working on it at all, but rather, you just want to buy yourself some time.
Why you should stop: It can create false expectations and lead to disappointment. Being honest about your progress (or lack thereof) allows for better planning and cooperation.
12. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
This is often used to avoid taking full responsibility for your actions that caused harm to others.
Why you should stop: It can minimize the other person’s feelings and avoid addressing the real issue. Acknowledging the hurt you caused and focusing on making it better is always more constructive.
13. “I’ll start my diet/exercise routine tomorrow.”
New year, new you? This is a common form of procrastination when it comes to health and lifestyle changes, especially close to January 1st.
Why you should stop: Constantly postponing important health decisions can have long-term negative effects. Being honest about your readiness to change and seeking support when you need it is going to produce a more positive outcome.
14. “I’m too busy.”
Sure, you can use this when you want to avoid a commitment you’d rather not deal with, but it’s kind of a cop-out.
Why you should stop: This excuse can damage relationships and prevent you from doing things with people you love. Be honest about your priorities and limitations, this way people will know what they can expect from you.
15. “I’m not angry.”
A lot of us get uncomfortable when we have big emotions, and we might deny them to avoid confrontation.
Why you should stop: Denying your anger can lead to passive-aggressive behavior and prolong conflict. Acknowledging your emotions, even difficult ones, allows for more honest communication and healthier emotional processing.
This article was created by a human with the assistance of AI.
