In a world where smooth talkers and social butterflies seem to rule, our socially inept souls prove that you don’t need charisma to leave a lasting impression. Armed with their trusty —Inappropriate Comment and Awkward Silence—these 15 deliverers of discomfort are here to save the day…or at least make it memorably uncomfortable.
1. The Close Talker
Clearly, this person hasn’t quite grasped the concept of personal space, (and according to Psychology Today it could be because of their height). They’ll get so close during a conversation that you can smell what they had for lunch. Even if you take a step back to create some sort of reprieve, they’ll move forward (like a chess piece). A good tip: Always have a drink in hand as a physical barrier.
2. The Oversharer
Information is this person’s currency, and they’re making it rain. From their recent colonoscopy results to the intimate details of their latest breakup, no topic is too personal or inappropriate. They’ll turn a simple “How are you?” into a 45-minute therapy session, and quite simply: that’s way above your pay grade.
3. The One-Upper
Whatever you’ve done, they’ve done it better, bigger, or more impressively. Climbed Mount Everest? They’ve climbed it twice, barefoot, while juggling. Won the championship for your recreational volleyball team? So did they, and they were invited to The Olympics, to boot. This person turns every conversation into a competition that nobody else knows they’re a part of.
4. The Inappropriate Joker
Oof, this one’s awkward. Even though humor is not this person’s strong suit, that doesn’t stop them from trying. They’ll crack jokes at the worst possible moments, like making a “that’s what she said” comment at a funeral or they’ll start laughing when you’re sharing a sad story. Two words: extremely cringe.
5. The Name Forgetter
This person would probably forget their own name if it wasn’t written on their driver’s license. They’ll meet you, immediately forget your name, and spend the rest of the conversation using vague terms like “buddy” or “you there.” Watching them panic when introductions are needed is like seeing a deer in headlights. Sure, not everyone has a great memory, but at least write it down, “buddy”!
6. The One-Word Responder
Oh god, the term “it’s like pulling teeth” was created because of this person. Every question is met with a one-syllable response, leaving you to do all the heavy lifting in the interaction. You ask them how their vacation was, and they respond with “good.” You ask about their kids, they say “They’re fine.” You’re talking to a brick wall personified.
7. The Fact Checker
Ugh, these people are the worst. If they have a smartphone on them (and they always do) you can bet your bottom dollar that they’re going to fact-check anything you say in real time. Maybe you said you once saw a blue whale and it was incredible. Before you’ve even finished your sentence, they’re Googling whale sightings in your area ready to disprove you at any turn.
8. The Topic Hog
This person has one interest and now interest only and you can be sure that every conversation will circle back to it. Whether it’s their collection of vintage spoons or their theories about alien life, they’ll steer any discussion in that direction with unfettered determination.
9. The Loud Mouth
Inside voice? What’s that? This loud talker seems to believe you’re standing way farther away than you actually are. You’re not standing a football field length away, you’re right here! Their booming voice dominates the room, making everyone else feel uncomfortable.
10. The Silent Statue
This silent observer seems to have missed the memo that social gatherings involve, well, socializing. They’ll stand in the corner, drink in hand, observing the room like they’re at an art gallery. Attempts to engage them in conversation are met with minimal responses, so you might as well not even try.
11. The Over Complainer
Nothing is ever right in this person’s world. The weather’s too hot or too cold, the food’s too spicy or too bland. Being around them is like listening to a never-ending Yelp review of life itself, always hovering around one star.
12. The Interrupter
This person is a real chatty Cathy or according to Verywell Mind, just excessively excited. They’ll jump into conversations mid-sentence, take over whenever they see fit, and just disregard any and all social niceties. Trying to finish a thought around them is as useless as eating soup with a fork.
13. The Apologizer
It’s funny—sorry seems to be the hardest word for most, but not for this apologetic soul. They’ll say sorry for existing, for breathing, for taking up space. They’re need to take the blame is chronic and to be honest, kind of annoying.
14. The Controversial Opinion Haver
This person is a contrarian and thrives on disagreement. They’ll take the opposing view on any topic, even if it contradicts what they said five minutes ago. Basically, they just say things for the element of shock and it’s hard to trust what they say.
15. The Inappropriate Question Asker
Boundaries and tact are foreign concepts to this person. They’ll ask deeply personal questions within minutes of meeting you, treating casual conversation like an interrogation. They have no shame—they’ll ask anything that pops up in their minds.
