When thinking of a gentleman, people tend to picture someone who has neat hair and is wearing a button-down shirt, dress pants, and fancy loafers. But a real gentleman can be defined by how he acts, not how he looks. A man with these memorable and notable personality traits can be put in this category, and he’ll likely have a lot of friends and admirers as a result.
1. He’s self-assured.
It can seem like a good thing when someone isn’t overly confident. But after a while, a man’s insecurities become more obvious, and a man’s partner might always feel like they have to build him up and make up for his nerves. If he’s self-assured, he’s a more compelling potential partner who could also be called a gentleman. This shows he has worked on himself and that he wants people to see him in a positive light.
2. He’s non-judgmental.
A gentleman would never judge someone about anything, whether they’re further behind in their career than they would like to be or prefer light reads over literary novels. If he thinks he’s above everyone and that no one can teach him anything, he’s the opposite of a gentleman. He should enjoy talking to people and learning more about them. If he’s always criticizing, then he’s too negative and won’t be fun to be around.
3. He’s independent.
A gentleman takes care of himself and doesn’t burden anyone. If he’s going on vacation, he cleans up his condo or house and takes the trash out beforehand so it doesn’t smell. He makes his own decisions and feels good about them. He goes the extra mile at work without his boss asking them. While these things, of course, make him look great, he does them because he likes knowing that he can rely on himself.
4. He’s compassionate.
He cares about what’s going on in the world and in his community. He thinks about the people he’s close to and hates when they’re suffering. He isn’t so focused on his own life that he can’t be there for people. All these things make him a gentleman who everyone wants to spend time with, whether they see him as a friend or romantic interest.
5. He’s kind.
While someone can be overly sweet, if a man isn’t kind, he isn’t going to make a great partner, let alone a great person to meet for dinner and chat with. A gentleman will treat people the way he wants to be treated (the way his parents taught him when he was growing up) and always ask himself if he’s coming from a caring place. He would never dream of insulting someone or fighting with people if he can help it. Unfortunately, there are a lot of unkind people in the online dating world, and so a truly nice man will stand out.
6. He’s not flashy about his money.
It’s not a great look when a man brags about how much he has in his bank account and always insists on paying for everything. While some would say a gentleman pays on the first date, others prefer to split the bill, and neither is the wrong perspective. A real gentleman will offer to help his family or friends when they’re having a crisis because he knows he’s in a position to do so. But he would never make anyone feel bad because he earns a higher salary than they do.
7. He’s responsible.
People might not necessarily look for a responsible person when dating. It’s not the most interesting quality or the most obvious. But a gentleman will take responsibility for his words, actions, past, present, and future. He’ll offer to help when a project comes up at work. He’ll be a good neighbor who agrees to look out for someone’s cat or take in their mail when they’re away. Most of all, he’ll take his relationships seriously and won’t back away when he needs to have a conversation about emotions.
8. He’s chatty.
Communication comes up time and time again on people’s lists of the most important things in a long-term relationship or marriage. When a man is chatty, he likes talking to anyone, from a coworker he doesn’t know very well to his new partner’s good friend. This makes him a gentleman because he would never let the conversation fall into awkward or upsetting silences, and he wants people to feel comfortable in his presence.
9. He likes making new friends.
Maybe he has some terrible friendships he wants to leave, or he has the mindset that more pals are always better. He’s clearly a gentleman when he is open to letting new people into his life. If he never talked to people he didn’t know and wanted to keep the same social circle he’s always had, that would definitely seem rude.
10. He’s family-oriented.
If he loves his family and sees them as regularly as he can, whether they live in the same city or further away, that’s a good sign. Or, if he doesn’t have a close relationship with his parents or other relatives because of circumstances beyond his control, then he treats his friends like family. When a man has close ties to other people in his life, it proves he’s considerate.
11. He’s comfortable being single.
A real gentleman would never complain about not having a partner or talk rudely about his friends who are coupled up. Of course, it’s fine if he wants to meet someone, and everyone can relate to that. But if he can maintain a positive attitude about his situation, he’ll be more likable and dignified. He’ll also be the kind of person that a future partner would want to talk to and spend time with, which will of course lead to the commitment he’s looking for.
12. He’s trustworthy.
If he can be relied on, he’s a gentleman. Is he going to pick up an extra shift for a sick coworker? Did he say he’ll wait in the virtual queue and try to snag those Bruce Springsteen concert tickets that are going to go fast? If he does what he says he’ll do, he’s the right kind of person to keep around.
13. He’s funny without being crude or cruel.
While everyone has a different idea of what’s hilarious, a gentleman doesn’t make fun of other people. He also doesn’t make dirty jokes… especially not around people who wouldn’t appreciate that. While he likes to laugh, and he has a funny personality, he doesn’t want to make anyone feel bad or uncomfortable.
14. He’s kind to people of all ages.
From the adorable toddler who lives in his apartment building to his mom’s best friend, he isn’t mean or disdainful of people younger or older than him. He sees the value in everyone and likes having conversations with people of all ages. If he wasn’t a gentleman, he would dismiss kids and teenagers as immature. He would also assume that since retired people are in a different life stage than him, he doesn’t need to talk to them.
15. He’s cautious without being boring.
Although some people can be overly careful and nervous about trying new things in their work and personal lives, a gentleman won’t be quite that anxious. He’ll take more calculated risks because while he wants to live his life, he doesn’t want to empty his savings or do something that he’ll regret. This balanced attitude makes him particularly impressive.
16. He thinks before he speaks.
While of course everyone blurts out something awkward or even insulting without meaning to sometimes, a gentleman will be more careful. He cares about how he’s perceived and he never wants to offend anyone. Everyone around him appreciates his calm nature and intelligence, and he likes his good reputation.
