Navigating social situations can be challenging, to say the least, but for people with exceptional social skills, it’s a breeze. They have a knack for saying the right thing at the right time to the right person. So, what’s their secret? What do they do differently compared to the rest of us?
1. They respect boundaries.
At the core of all social interactions is respect for boundaries. People with excellent social skills get this and follow it. They know when to ask questions, when to stay quiet, when to give advice, and when to listen. They understand the importance of personal space, both physically and emotionally. Respecting boundaries means recognizing that everyone has needs, preferences, and limits. It’s about treating people with the same respect we want for ourselves. While it can be challenging to navigate these boundaries, doing so is critical to building healthy, respectful, and meaningful relationships.
2. They know when to be silent.
People who are good at socializing know when to stay quiet. For example, they get that letting everyone speak without jumping in too quickly is essential in a big argument. When they keep calm, it shows they respect different opinions and make room for good conversations. In social places, they can tell when it’s better to be silent instead of talking a lot, which helps everyone feel more relaxed and willing to share. Being good at knowing when to be quiet shows they’re emotionally intelligent, making chats smoother and relationships firmer.
3. They ask questions.
Asking questions is something people who are good at socializing often do, per Harvard Business Review. For example, let’s say you’re chatting with someone about their recent trip. Instead of nodding your head and listening, you ask them about their favorite part of the journey or what they learned. When you ask questions like these, you’re genuinely interested in what they say and want to know more about them. This makes the conversation more interesting and lets the other person share more about themselves, which helps you get to know them better. Asking questions also shows that you’re listening, which is essential for building a good connection with someone. By asking questions in conversations, you can make socializing more fun and build stronger friendships with people.
4. They smile a lot.
Smiling is a simple but powerful habit of people who are good at socializing. When you smile, it makes people feel like you’re friendly and nice. For instance, consider going to a party where someone greets you with a big smile. It instantly makes you feel good and ready to talk. Smiling makes people feel happy and shows that you’re ready to chat, making it easier for people to come up and talk to you. And guess what? Smiles can spread! When you smile, other people are more likely to smile back.
5. They maintain eye contact.
Keeping eye contact is essential for folks who are good at talking to others. Imagine chatting with someone who is constantly looking away or at their phone while talking. It makes you feel they do not listen or care about your words. But when someone looks you in the eye while you’re talking, it shows they’re paying attention, and they respect what you have to say. This simple thing helps people trust each other and feel closer, which makes talking more fun and meaningful. So, by keeping eye contact, you can improve at talking to others and create stronger friendships.
6. They pay attention to body language.
People who are good at socializing pay close attention to body language. For example, think about being at a party and watching someone great at talking to people. They don’t just hear what’s being said; they also notice things like how someone’s face looks, how they’re standing, and what movements they make. They can determine the other person’s feelings and interests by paying attention to these things. This helps them act in a way that keeps the conversation going smoothly and helps them connect better with others. Understanding and reacting to body language makes them better at talking to people and being empathetic in social situations.
7. They actively listen.
Active listening is a crucial habit for people who are great at socializing. It means paying attention to what someone is saying. Picture this: in a conversation, someone actively listening will look at you, nod, and show they’re interested. They won’t interrupt you; instead, they’ll let you finish before they respond. This helps people feel respected and understood. Those who are good at socializing make active listening a regular thing. It boosts their relationships and communication skills, making them stand out in social situations.
8. They show gratitude.
Thank you is essential for folks who are great at speaking to others. For example, let’s say someone helps you with a project, and you genuinely thank them. That simple act shows that you appreciate their help and makes your bond stronger. When people feel appreciated, they’re more likely to keep helping you out in the future. Plus, when you express gratitude, it makes everyone feel happy and good about themselves. It creates a nice vibe where people want to be kind and helpful to each other. So, saying thank you often can improve friendships and spread good feelings in your social group.
9. They show empathy.
As Verywell Mind explains, empathy means understanding and sharing other people’s feelings. It’s like putting yourself in their place and seeing the world through their eyes. People with excellent social skills are very empathetic. They don’t just listen to what people say; they also feel their emotions. They get what people are going through and celebrate their successes. Being truly understood by someone else is fantastic and creates a robust and lasting bond. Developing this kind of empathy will make your social interactions more fulfilling. You’ll connect with people better, understand their needs, and offer meaningful support.
10. They give compliments.
Giving compliments is something people who are good at socializing often do. For example, imagine your friend gets a new haircut, and you tell them how awesome it looks on them. Giving someone a genuine compliment makes them feel excellent about themselves and shows that you care about them. Compliments help people feel more confident and bring a friendly vibe to conversations. Plus, complimenting people makes them more likely to like and trust you because you make them feel valued. Overall, saying nice things to people makes socializing fun and creates a culture of kindness and appreciation among friends.
11. They use names frequently.
Using someone’s name when you talk to them is more than just polite — it helps you feel closer to each other. People who are good at talking to people often use names a lot. Studies using brain scans have found that hearing our name makes parts of our brain active, linked to how we see ourselves and act around people. That’s probably why we like it when someone uses our name when they talk to us. So, next time you chat, try saying the other person’s name. It could help them feel more connected to you and more interested in what you’re saying. But be careful not to say it too much, or it might have the opposite effect. Use this trick wisely!
12. They’re genuine and authentic.
People who are good at talking to others know how important it is to be accurate. They don’t just stick to talking about simple stuff, and they’re not scared to show their true feelings. Instead, they share their own stories, thoughts, and emotions. They understand that honesty helps build trust, which is super important in any friendship or relationship. Being genuine doesn’t mean you must tell everyone everything or be too emotional. It’s more about being yourself and letting other people see that. It’s about being kind and understanding towards what people are going through.
13. They’re adaptable.
Being adaptable in social situations means you can change your behavior and approach depending on the context and the people you’re with. People with excellent social skills can do this easily. They can switch smoothly between talking to a coworker, a close friend, or a stranger. They know when to be professional, when to be casual, and when to be supportive. Adaptability also involves being open to new ideas, cultures, and perspectives. It’s about embracing diversity and learning from others. To improve your social skills, try becoming more adaptable.
14. They avoid gossiping.
Not talking about other people behind their backs is essential for those who are good at socializing. For example, let’s say you’re hanging out with some friends, and one of them starts saying bad things about someone else. Instead of joining in, you decide to change the subject or leave the conversation. Doing this shows that you care about how other people feel and don’t want to spread rumors. Avoiding gossip stops unnecessary drama and helps everyone trust each other more. When your friends see that you don’t gossip, they’re more likely to trust you with their secrets and feel safe around you. Overall, staying away from gossip helps build better and happier relationships.
15. They’re approachable.
People with excellent social skills make it easy for people to approach them, which is crucial for good interactions. For example, someone with strong social skills would use open body language at a networking event, smile genuinely, and look friendly. They would stand in inaccessible places near entrances or common areas and chat casually with many people. This shows they are open to talking, making other people comfortable starting conversations. Being approachable helps them make new connections and strengthen existing ones, highlighting their social skillfulness.