You might be a catch who says all the right things and remembers to bring her flowers on a date. And yet, you might be making the woman in your life so angry that she wants to leave your texts on read or vent about you to her friends over tequila shots. Without realizing it, you could be guilty of these 15 habits that are making her lose her mind (and not in a good way).
1. Lacking passion and motivation
Whenever you chat to her during the day, you always say you’re not doing much or you’re “just chilling.” She’s going to get the idea that you’ve got zero ambition and passion for anything. This will put her off you because she doesn’t want to be stuck with someone who’s bored all the time — it makes you seem boring! Honestly, there’s nothing sexier than someone who knows what they want from life and is out there working on getting it every day.
2. Not picking up after yourself
You’re not 12 anymore, so there’s no excuse to leave your clothing and underwear all over the bedroom floor. She’s going to feel like you expect her to be your mother rather than your partner, The Guardian warns. Not cleaning up after yourself is a sign that you don’t care about or respect yourself OR her, which is a no-no. Oh, and please don’t forget to clean up your car too — if the seats are strewn with candy wrappers and empty soda bottles, she’s going to feel like she’s stepping into a dump.
3. Being a noisy eater
If you make a lot of noise while you eat food, such as chewing loudly or scraping your fork against your plate, it’s super annoying. When you’re on a date with a woman, she’s going to notice all the little things you do to ensure that you’re polite. Making a racket when eating comes across as clumsy and ill-mannered. It also shows that you’re not self-aware, which can be a red flag since it points ot you lacking awareness of your behavior.
4. Staring at other women
You might be in the habit of looking at other women when you and your partner are out and about. While this doesn’t have to be a big deal, it is something that’s going to make her blood boil if you’re gaping and gawking. She might be tempted to wave her hand in front of your face and say, “Hello? Are you in there?” It’s really disrespectful and might make her wonder just how into her you really are. You should make her feel like she’s got your undivided attention, not like you’re going to run after anyone else who looks interesting.
5. Not saying “thank you”
Another ill-mannered habit is not saying “thank you” when a woman does something nice for you. Whether it’s fixing your collar or bringing you a hot cup of coffee when you’re working late, it’s important to make her feel valued for big and small good deeds. If you make her feel like you’re taking her for granted or expecting her to be nice to you for nothing in return, she’s going to wonder why she’s dating you.
6. Not making an effort on dates
Sticking to the same type of date activity every single time you hang out with her is boring. What, coffee and movies again? Ugh. She’s going to feel like you don’t want to make any effort in keeping her interested or experiencing new things with her. It’s also important to make an effort with your appearance by dragging a brush through your hair and wearing something a bit classier than a mustard-stained tracksuit. She doesn’t want to feel like you equate spending time with her with lying on the couch.
7. Being a mansplainer
She tries to tell you that she wants to vacation in Thailand or start a beauty business, and you go off on a tangent about how it’s dangerous to travel alone as a woman or how the industry is saturated right now and the venture isn’t likely to succeed. You speak to her as if you know everything about what she’s interested in and she knows nothing. It’s so frustrating! Give her a chance to share her knowledge on various topics, instead of assuming that it’s your role to educate her. Nothing shuts down a conversation faster than a mansplainer.
8. Talking over her
You might be so excited to talk to her that you don’t realize you’re dominating the conversation. Maybe you cut her off and interrupt her every five minutes, or you go off about your day without even caring to ask about her. Talking over her is a way to shut her down and make her feel invisible. It’ll drive her crazy that she couldn’t get a word in, while also making her think you only care about yourself.
9. Making last-minute plans every single time
While you might think being spontaneous and asking her out at the last minute is romantic, it can become frustrating if all you’re doing is suggesting dates on the fly. Sometimes she wants to be wined and dined by someone who makes an effort to plan dates ahead of time. It shows her that you’re not choosing what’s convenient and want to commit to building a real relationship.
10. Showing a lack of accountability
When something goes wrong and you mess up, she wants you to be adult enough to step up and own it. If you’re always dodging accountability, such as by blaming everyone and everything else for your problems, she’ll start thinking that you’re a man-child who’s playing the victim card. It’s draining for her to have to deal with.
11. Zoning out when she’s speaking
One of the most important ways to make a woman feel special is to listen to her. Putting your phone away and avoiding distractions in your environment when you’re with her shows her that she’s a priority. If you give her blank looks when she starts talking about things that matter to her because you’re distracted, she’s going to think you’re not empathetic or interested in making an effort to show her you care.
12. Running hot and cold
There’s nothing more frustrating than when a woman shows interest in you and then has to deal with you giving her mixed messages. It messes with her head and makes her wonder if you’re serious about her. You might be doing this because you have commitment or trust issues, but it’s pushing her away. Whatever you’re dealing with that’s stopping you from connecting with her, speak up about it so she knows it’s not about her.
13. Burping while you eat
Although you might feel totally comfortable in her presence to let rip with a big burp, this isn’t something you should be doing all the time. Even if you’ve been dating for six months, there’s a time and place for burping. Sometimes it’s totally inappropriate, especially if you do it loudly and act as if it’s something to be proud of. How is she supposed to eat her food when you’re making loud noises with your mouth that stink of the nachos you just wolfed down? Gross! Some basic table manners go a long way.
14. Farting mid-sentence
Another behavior you should avoid doing, even if you’re comfortable around your partner, is passing gas when you’re in the middle of a conversation with her. She might think the look on your face is a sign you’re about to say something really deep and wise, only to hear you fart. Ugh. It’s so childish, especially if you think it’s the funniest thing ever or if you’ve derailed her thought. She just wanted to have a serious conversation with you. Is that so much to ask?
15. Gaming all day long
Chances are, when you told her how much you love gaming, she thought it was cool that you have a passion. However, prioritizing excessive gaming, like if you’re playing for 16 hours a day instead of spending quality time with her, will make her feel neglected. She’ll feel like you don’t care about being with her because you’d rather be working on achieving your gaming goals, in which she’s not even included.
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