Meeting new people is exciting, but when you’ve just met someone, knowing the right things to say can also be a challenge. Sometimes it can feel like you’ve put your foot in your mouth and blown your first impression. Take a look at this list of things to avoid saying to someone you just met.
1. “When are you due?”
This one tops the list because you should pretty much never ask it. You never know someone’s situation, and pregnancy is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. If you’ve just met someone, there’s no way to gauge if there’s a chance they might be pregnant, no matter what they look like. So just zip it, ‘kay?
2. “You remind me of my ex.”
Honestly, there’s never a good time to tell someone they remind you of their ex. But if you do it to someone you’ve just met, there’s a good chance they won’t have any idea how to take it, given they don’t know your history.
3. “Are you single?”
If you’ve just met someone because you’re on a date, hopefully you already know the answer to this question. But if you’re just in line at the supermarket, keep this one tucked away until you get to know them a little better.
4. “Did you hear about _____?”
Starting your relationship with gossip can not only be off-putting, but can be detrimental to the development of the relationship. Until you really know how someone feels, keep hearsay to a minimum.
5. “You look really tired.”
Chances are if someone is tired, they know they look tired. It’s rude to point out their haggard appearance when you’ve just met them. Save that kind of comment for someone you know well enough to not be offended.
6. “How much do you make?”
This question should probably come up at some point if you’re entering into a serious relationship, but not when you’ve only just met. This question is not first date material, and it’s certainly not for someone random you just met.
7. “You’re not what I imagined.”
Having expectations for yourself is great, however having expectations of strangers is setting yourself up for disappointment. When you’ve just met is certainly not the right time to tell them they haven’t reached your expectations.
8. “Can I borrow money?”
It’s one thing to ask for a dollar for the vending machine from a friend, but asking for money of any significant amount is a little strange from someone you just met.
9. “What’s that smell?”
Everyone has their own scent, and occasionally, you’re going to come across some that are less pleasing than others. Sniffing the air or asking “what’s that smell?” to someone you’ve just met can really be taken the wrong way. However, “You smell great!” is perfectly acceptable, providing it’s true.
10. “I don’t really care about that.”
If someone you just met is on a topic you don’t care about, it’s not the best time to tell them you don’t care about that topic. It would be better to try to change the subject in an organic way.
11. “What a weird name.”
Plenty of people have unique names you’ve maybe never heard before. When someone is introducing themselves is not the best time to make comments about their name. Since they’ve lived with the name all their lives, chances are they’ve heard whatever you’re about to say before.
12. “I would never do that!”
Maybe you don’t agree with something they’ve just told you, but meeting someone for the first time isn’t when you should be passing judgments with statements like this. If you get to know someone you can certainly give your opinion if asked.
13. “I don’t believe you.”
When you’re having that first conversation with someone, it’s best to smile and nod while taking in what they say, rather than becoming argumentative or accusatory. Save the friendly debates for your friends.
14. “______ told me all about you.”
There’s a reason the common response to this statement is “good things, I hope!” And that’s because most of us really don’t like the idea of someone talking about us to a stranger when we’re not around. Even if you know their whole life story, keep it discrete.
15. “I love you!”
You might think this one wouldn’t come up the first time you’ve met someone, but I’ve heard it many times. It’s great if you’re really vibing with someone you just met, but not everyone is open with those three little words. To be safe, wait until the relationship is more established before any declarations of love.
