Attractiveness isn’t all about Botox-filled lips and six-pack abs. While physical attraction is a thing, of course, there are plenty of things that are within your control that determine how hot you really are and how drawn to you people will be. If you want to be more appealing, try doing the following things.
1. Ditch the self-deprecating jokes.
Pointing out your flaws preemptively and fishing for compliments isn’t charming. It trains people to look for the bad. True confidence is quietly owning who you are, without needing to put yourself down for laughs. This radiates way more sex appeal than agonizing over every perceived imperfection.
2. Get good at giving a genuine compliment.
We’re not talking about a generic “love your dress,” but noticing the details. “That song choice was perfect,” or, “You have the best storytelling voice” shows you’re paying attention to what makes them unique. This makes people feel seen, Psychology Today notes, which is surprisingly magnetic.
3. Wear clothes that make you feel good, trends be damned.
Chasing what’s “in” but doesn’t suit you creates an awkwardness that shows. Rock that vintage dress that makes you feel like a bombshell, even if it’s not the latest cut. Comfort and confidence in your own skin is hot, no matter your body type.
4. Curiosity is way sexier than having all the answers.
The person holding court, lecturing everyone is boring! Someone who’s genuinely excited to learn from others, asks good questions, and listens without interrupting, on the other hand, is really hot. These habits show intelligence and humility, which are a killer combo.
5. Ditch the gossiping.
Trash-talking makes you look bad, even if what you’re saying is true. It also tells people that you’ll do the same to them eventually. Instead, be the one known for saying kind things, or at least, neutral ones. That positive energy draws people in.
6. Practice good posture.
Yes, it really does matter! Stand tall with your chin up and your shoulders back. Slouching radiates insecurity, even if you’re drop-dead gorgeous. It takes some practice to undo old habits, but this subtle change has a major impact on how people perceive you.
7. Your passions are attractive, so embrace them!
When your eyes light up when you talk about something you love, it’s infectious! Gushing about your weird stamp collection is way hotter than pretending to be bored by everything. Don’t hide the things that bring you joy for fear of seeming like “too much.”
8. Make eye contact and actively listen.
Phones down! Being fully present makes people feel valued. Even a brief interaction becomes way more memorable with your focused attention. This skill’s rare, making you stand out in the best possible way.
9. Don’t be afraid to respectfully disagree.
Being a pushover is not the same as being kind. Knowing your own mind and expressing differing opinions (without being a jerk about it!) shows strength. People pleasers fade into the background, while those with self-assuredness have a captivating edge.
10. Develop a warm, genuine smile.
Forced smiles look creepy; it’s about your whole face lighting up. Thinking about something happy helps create that naturalness. A welcoming smile makes people feel instantly at ease, drawing them in more than someone stunning, but with a cold expression.
11. Be playfully unpredictable.
Always sticking rigidly to routines is dull. Spontaneity keeps things interesting! Suggest a silly detour on a walk, or try that weird flavor combo everyone else is scared of. This zest for life and willingness to not take yourself too seriously is super appealing.
12. Take ownership of your mistakes.
“Whoops, my bad!” is way more endearing than defensiveness. We all mess up, but having the ability to laugh at yourself and to show you’re not hung up on being perfect builds trust. It makes people feel comfortable being less-than-perfect around you too.
13. Learn to tell a good story.
Not bragging, but using humor, pacing, a bit of drama turns mundane experiences into entertainment! Master this, and people seek you out. Even average looks paired with a captivating personality will always outshine someone who’s all beauty, no substance.
14. Focus on your overall health, not just the number on the scale.
Chasing an idealized body image only makes you miserable, which shows. When you move joyfully, eat to feel good, and prioritize sleep, it radiates outward. That healthy glow and vibrancy is way more attractive than being thin but constantly stressed and deprived.
15. Embrace silliness!
The person too cool for karaoke is way less fun to be around. Those willing to let loose, make bad jokes, and try new things with zero ego at stake. Those people bring the joy, making everyone around them relax and feel more attractive themselves.
16. Have a signature scent, but keep it subtle.
You don’t want a cloud that announces you from across the room, but a hint of something unique when people get close creates a sense memory, InStyle explains. Make it yours – vanilla extract, a specific clean laundry soap… pick what works for you. It’s a surprisingly powerful and subtle boost to your overall aura.
17. Surround yourself with people who lift you up.
Energy is contagious. People who are always complaining or playing it safe eventually drag you down. Friends who cheerlead your wins, and who see your potential even when you don’t are the kinds of people you want to be around.
18. Don’t make self-care a luxury, make it a basic necessity.
You radiate an entirely different vibe when you’re frazzled vs. feeling well-rested and cared for. Those moments to fill your own cup aren’t selfish, they’re essential. That makes you a better partner, friend, and more magnetic all around.
19. True kindness stands out in a snarky world.
Helping without needing recognition and remembering small details about someone’s life shows genuine care that’s extremely rare. It creates a feeling of safety and being truly seen, which is incredibly powerful and sadly lacking for a lot of folks.
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