Are you finding yourself in conversations with younger generations and suddenly feeling like you’ve time-traveled from another era? Don’t worry, we’ve got your back. Here’s a list of 18 things you might want to avoid saying if you don’t want to sound like you’ve just stepped out of a time machine (or worse, your parents).
1. “When I was your age…”
Oh boy, nothing makes you sound older faster than this. It’s like announcing, “Gather ’round, youngsters, for a tale from the ancient times” It immediately creates a generational divide and often comes across as dismissive of current experiences. Instead, try: “That reminds me of a similar situation I faced…” This keeps the conversation relatable without emphasizing the age gap.
2. “You kids and your technology…”
Congratulations, you’ve just won the “OK, Boomer” lottery! It suggests you’re out of touch and resistant to change. Alternatively? Express genuine curiosity about new tech. Ask them to explain how something works—you might learn something cool!
3. “Back in my day, we didn’t have…”
Ah yes, the good ol’ days when everything was harder and character-building. Except, you know, it wasn’t always better. This often comes across as a humble brag about enduring hardships, which can be alienating. Instead, go with: “It’s amazing how things have changed. What do you think about [current related topic]?” This acknowledges change without glorifying the past.
4. “You’re always on your phone!”
Welcome to the 21st century, where phones are extensions of our hands. This kind of oversimplifies complex social and technological shifts. A better approach would be something like, “I’m curious about how you use your phone. What are some apps or features you find most useful?” This opens up a dialogue instead of passing judgment.
5. “What’s the deal with [insert popular trend]?”
Oy vey, this one can come across as dismissive or mocking of things younger people enjoy. If you genuinely want to learn, try a phrase like, “I’ve been hearing a lot about [trend]. What do you think about it?” This shows openness to learning about new things.
6. “Music these days is just noise.”
Hello, grumpy old person. Every generation thinks this about the next one’s music. But it dismisses an entire generation’s cultural expression. Try: “I’m not familiar with a lot of current music. What artists do you recommend?” This opens the door to discovering new tunes (or grooves, if that’s what you call them).
7. “In the real world…”
Because apparently, younger people are living in some kind of Matrix-style simulation? This implies that their experiences aren’t valid or “real.” A more connected approach would be something like, “How do you see that playing out in your future plans?” This acknowledges their perspective while discussing practical applications.
8. “You’ll understand when you’re older.”
The classic dismissal of young people’s thoughts and feelings. A better way to go about this would be: “That’s an interesting view. I’ve found that my perspective has changed over time. I’m curious to see how we both might think about this in the future.”
9. “Why don’t you just get a job at [company] and work your way up?”
Welcome to the 1950s, where you could walk into a company, demand a job, and be CEO by 30. This is way out of touch as it oversimplifies (that’s putting it lightly) the current job market and economy. Try asking, “What’s the job market like in your field right now? What strategies are you using in your job search?”
10. “You’re too young to be tired/stressed/anxious.”
Because apparently, life’s challenges wait for a specific age to kick in? This is not the one—it invalidates the real feelings and experiences of younger people. Try: “That sounds tough. Want to talk about what’s going on?” This shows empathy and opens up a supportive conversation.
11. “Why don’t you just buy a house?”
Sure, let me just check my money tree out back… Similar to the “working your way up” phrase, this one ignores the current economic realities many younger people face. A more understanding approach? “The housing market seems really challenging right now. How are you navigating it?”
12. “You need to start thinking about having kids soon.”
This is incredibly personal and assumes everyone wants the same life path. Instead, try: “What are your thoughts on family planning, if you don’t mind me asking?” This opens the door for discussion without pressure.
13. “When I was your age, I was already [life milestone].”
Bravo on peaking early? Is that what we’re going for here? This imposes outdated timelines and ignores how society has changed. A better way: “Everyone’s journey is different. What milestones are important to you right now?”
14. “You’re always watching those YouTubes.”
First of all, it’s just “YouTube,” singular. And second, ok, Grandpa. Try this: “I’ve heard YouTube has a lot of great content. What kind of videos do you enjoy watching?”
15. “In my day, we respected our elders.”
And in their day, they probably complained about respecting their elders too. It’s the circle of life! A more productive approach: “I’d love to understand your perspective better. Can we talk about [issue] openly?”
16. “What’s a meme?”
While it’s okay not to know everything, this one’s been around long enough that asking might make you sound like you’ve been living under a rock. Instead, try: “I’ve seen a lot of memes but I’m not always sure I get them. What are some of your favorites?”
17. “Why are you always texting? Just call them!”
Because nothing says “I’m hip and with it” quite like insisting on outdated communication methods. A more understanding approach: “I’m curious about why texting is preferred over calling these days. What do you see as the benefits?”
18. “Life was better before social media.”
Sure, and it was probably better before electricity too, right? Sure, social media has its issues but it also dismisses the positive aspects and the genuine connections many people form through it. Try this instead: “Social media has really changed how we interact. What do you see as the pros and cons?”