There’s so much said about physical intimacy in relationships, but did you know that emotional intimacy is even more important? Yup. In fact, without it, you might feel like you’re missing something because you and your partner don’t have each other’s backs. Here are the sad signs this emotional intimacy is lacking from your partnership.
1. You and your partner don’t open up to each other.
You might have noticed that you and your partner don’t really open up about your thoughts, feelings, and dreams like you used to. You might think that you’ve left the honeymoon phase behind so this is normal, but clearly, there’s an emotional connection that’s lacking.
2. You feel misunderstood.
If you feel misunderstood in your relationship on the regular, it’s downright frustrating. Your partner just doesn’t get where you’re coming from, which can make you feel like you’re alone—even when they’re right in the room with you.
3. You have sex, but your relationship lacks affection.
Although you might still be having sex regularly, you and your partner don’t seem to have any affection outside of the bedroom. According to Marriage.com, this can cause a sense of disconnect in your relationship. Remember, what happens outside of the bedroom will sooner or later impact what happens inside it.
4. You or your partner don’t show empathy.
Maybe you feel a lack of empathy for what your partner’s going through, or vice versa. This could happen as a result of resentment or frustration in your relationship. It makes you less caring and patient with your partner.
5. You’ve been fighting a lot more.
If you and your partner seem to be arguing over silly little things these days, it could signal a lack of emotional intimacy. Everything is another opportunity to fight—you’re not talking things out and discussing issues, so they’re boiling over.
6. You don’t feel supported.
It’s depressing when you don’t feel supported by your partner. Although they don’t have to agree with everything you choose or think, they should at least give you emotional support. Without that, the relationship can feel pretty bleak.
7. You’re reaching out to others.
If you’re reaching out to your friends or family members for emotional support or to talk through your relationship issues, clearly you’re not getting this emotional intimacy from your partner. You might feel like you need help from people outside of the relationship because you’re so lonely in it.
8. You don’t talk as much as you used to.
Have you noticed that you don’t talk to your partner as much as you used to? This could be something that’s happened subconsciously because you don’t feel that talking gives you the connection and satisfaction that you’re after. Maybe you leave conversations with them feeling angry or sad.
9. Your partner talks a lot more.
Although you’ve stopped sharing as much with your partner, they might be talking much more. What gives? They might feel safe to be themselves in the relationship, but you don’t, so the relationship is unbalanced. While their needs are being met, yours aren’t.
10. Your texting habits have changed a lot.
Maybe you and your partner used to text each other all the time, but now the texting has fizzled out. This could be happening because there’s not a strong emotional connection. You might also notice that your texts are always sexual or flirtatious, instead of being emotional.
11. You don’t ask each other for advice.
If you trust and value your partner, you’ll want to reach out to them when you need advice on a situation that’s bugging you. It’s a red flag that your relationship has zero emotional intimacy if you’d rather ask someone else for help.
12. You or your partner shut down during fights.
You can tell a lot about your relationship intimacy by how you argue with your partner according to Vice. If you or your partner always shut down during arguments, such as if you stop talking and storm out of the room, this prevents communication and the resolution of issues.
13. You don’t consider each other’s needs.
If you never think about your partner’s needs or they ignore yours, you’re going to feel disappointment and resentment. You don’t feel seen or heard, which makes you feel like your partner doesn’t care about you.
14. You don’t say you love each other.
When did you and your partner last tell each other that you love each other? If you never say these words, even though you used to, it could be a sign that you’re both no longer making as much effort to stay emotionally tuned into each other.
15. You’re critical of each other.
Your relationship could do with much more emotional intimacy if you’re always putting each other down. All that frustration and resentment you could be feeling is coming out in the form of verbal insults or negging.
16. You’re feeling negative about the future.
When you think about your relationship’s future, you might feel negative about it. You can’t imagine not having an emotionally supportive relationship in your life, and that’s making you dream of being single again.
