It’s hard to know which relationships are worth your time. You might really bond with someone one minute, then find yourself wondering if they’re good for you the next. Read about these types of people you should never trust in life to discern which people are healthy influences and which might be eroding your mental health.
1. People who never apologize.
Someone who refuses to apologize isn’t healthy to be around. They’ll never accept responsibility or learn from their mistakes. You can’t grow with someone who chooses to protect their ego over their part in keeping your relationship alive.
2. People who are only ever positive.
Toxic positivity often results in communication issues because the positive person won’t acknowledge their real needs or desires. It’s hard to get close to someone or trust them if you feel like they never open up about what’s really going on.
3. People who never want to slow down.
Although it can be motivating to have a friend who’s always productive, it can also make you feel like you should work equally as hard. Never taking breaks or slowing down means you could experience burnout. It’s much better to surround yourself with people who know how to balance those two essential needs.
4. People who flatter you to get something from you.
Compliments are lovely, but they feel empty when the person complimenting you only wants to butter you up. Once you’re aware of this red flag, you’ll have a hard time knowing if they really mean what they say. Close friends or partners should compliment you just because they love you, not because they want something.
5. People who always play the victim.
If someone is blaming everyone else for their problems, that’s a red flag. It means that they’re avoiding finding solutions to their problems and using their issues to get attention. Someone who does this isn’t self-aware and doesn’t take ownership of themselves—don’t trust them.
6. People who tell minor lies.
Tiny lies might not seem powerful, but they’re dangerous. If someone’s fine with lying to you about something meaningless, they might think lying in general is fine. You won’t be able to trust your friend, family member, or partner when it comes to bigger issues if you frequently catch them lying.
7. People who name-drop to boost their popularity.
It’s cool to find out someone knows someone famous or well-known, but you might start to feel small when that person brags about it all the time. It often feels like that person is trying to climb the social popularity ladder and will leave you behind if you don’t garner the same social standing.
8. People who talk badly about others they call their friends.
Talking badly about a close friend when that friend isn’t around shows a lack of care. If someone does this, it’s a clear sign you can’t trust them because they don’t have any loyalty. If they’re talking about their so-called “friends” behind their backs, just imagine what they’re saying about you.
9. People who change their personality based on who they’re with.
It’s one thing to talk differently or act more professionally in certain settings. It’s another to change your values and passions to be someone’s friend. Anyone who does this has a major lack of true self-identity, making any interpersonal bond harder to form.
10. People who always mention how honest they are.
Truly good people don’t need to brag about how honest or good they are. Their actions and reputation speak for themselves. Someone who’s always saying how they’re “real,” authentic, or genuinely good might be trying too hard to prove they’re something they’re not.
11. People who never disagree with you.
Someone who always agrees with others may not have the self-confidence to address their own concerns or needs. It makes any relationship tricky to navigate. They could also have more manipulative people in their lives because an agreeable person is easy to force into bad situations, like a roommate dynamic where the agreeable individual pays all the bills.
12. People who constantly trauma dump.
Friends should feel safe confiding in each other when they’re hurting. That said, they should also find therapists if they need to talk about their traumatic pasts all the time. Hearing traumatic stories will emotionally drain you and potentially make you feel responsible for helping your friend heal.
13. People who only hang out with you to take pictures for social media.
Authentic relationships result in private and publicly shared memories. When someone only hangs out with you to get pictures for their social media profiles, they’re likely only using you as a social prop. It’s degrading and embarrassing, so get yourself out of this dynamic if it feels familiar.
14. People who refuse to respect your boundaries.
Boundaries are healthy. When someone respects your boundaries, it builds a better relationship. People who overstep your boundaries, like not texting late at night or drinking, prioritize their own wants over your needs. It’s not a healthy dynamic for long-term relationships of any kind.
15. People who don’t ask about your life.
Toxic individuals will never inquire how you’re doing or what’s happening in your daily life because they don’t value you. If you never feel like you can talk about yourself with someone, they’re not being the thoughtful friend or partner you deserve.
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