In the words of the great Luann de Lesseps, “Money can’t buy you class.” It’s one of those things that hovers around you like a spritz of expensive perfume, making people want to get closer. Best of all, you don’t have to resort to crazy tactics to achieve it. All you have to do is make sure you avoid these 15 behaviors.
1. Chewing loudly in public
While chewing gum can help to keep your breath fresh or grabbing a snack on the go can tide you over until dinner, it’s annoying to other people who have to watch you chomping away like a cow in a field. Classy people avoid it because it makes them look like they lack manners, especially if they open their mouths, smack their lips, and try to talk in-between chewing. Gross.
2. Gossiping about people
Classy people don’t like to lower themselves and gain a bad reputation by talking crap about people, spreading rumors and false information (or even true stories). You won’t catch them whispering into someone’s ear at a brunch or giggling about someone’s bad news. It’s tacky and negative, while making them seem untrustworthy to others.
3. Under- or overdressing
The thing about sophisticated people is that they’re in tune with dress codes and dressing appropriately. You won’t find them walking through the streets flaunting the gnarly underwear-as-outerwear trend, or going over the top with their fashion choices when hitting up a work event. They set themselves apart from the crowd, but don’t stick out like a sore thumb.
4. Becoming obnoxious after drinking too much
You won’t find a sophisticated person drinking an entire bottle of wine before going out so that they end up making a fool of themselves by becoming too loud or obnoxious, GQ reminds us. They don’t want to be known for unruly behavior because it detracts from their image of sophistication and self-control. So, they’ll keep an eye on their booze intake to avoid drawing unwanted attention and getting a bad rep.
5. Losing their composure
Classy people know that losing their temper, such as by screaming at someone during an argument, will undermine their composure and dignity. They keep a firm grip on their emotions during high-stress situations, preventing a blow up that comes across as trashy or rude. They’d rather handle conflicts with grace and poise, maintaining their self-respect. This, in turn, makes everyone respect them more.
6. Laughing too loud
While there’s nothing wrong with being loud and proud, if you want to be perceived as classy you should check your volume. Laughing or cackling loudly in public makes you seem bad-mannered, ’cause it’s annoying for people in the vicinity. It draws unwanted attention from other people, while also sending them the message that you’re so desperate to be seen and heard.
7. Interrupting people
Trying to dominate people during conversation is so rude and arrogant, it’s something classy people avoid doing like the plague. They focus on treating people with respect and empathy, considering their opinions and contributions to the conversation. By uplifting people and making them feel seen, they create a supportive environment.
8. Bragging about their achievements
Classy people would cringe at the thought of boasting about their success or personal traits. They’re confident enough to know that they don’t need to draw attention to themselves in order to gain validation from people. Modesty and humility are two of their biggest traits, which show up in their interactions with everyone they meet. They gain fulfillment from their accomplishments, without having to brag about them.
9. Arriving late
The thing about being chronically late to everything is that it gives you a bad name. It makes people think you’re rude and wasteful of their time, which is so disrespectful. The “c” in classy is for courteous! This is why someone who’s sophisticated will be mindful of their time as well as other people’s. They strive to build trust in their relationships, so they’ll show up on time and honor their commitments.
10. Talking on speakerphone in public
Some conversations need to remain private! Classy people like to maintain a clear boundary between their private and public lives. So, you won’t catch them talking about their personal issues on speakerphone, so strangers can hear them. They know no one wants to hear about their dental appointment or the flight they had with their best friend.
11. Being rude to waitstaff
Classy people treat everyone with dignity and respect, whether they’re dealing with loved ones or strangers. They don’t resort to tactics like trying to throw their weight around because it makes them seem powerful. They know that’s not real power. So, if a waiter gets their order wrong or forgets to bring them sparkling water, they’ll speak to them kindly instead of making everyone else uncomfortable with their offensive comments.
12. Name-dropping
The thing about people who are elegant and classy is that they don’t go around telling people that they are, or trying to make people see them in that light. It’s like how kind and honest people don’t have to advertise these traits. So, you won’t find classy people name-dropping to make it seem like they rub shoulders with the best of the best. They hold their own!
13. Dressing rich
While it’s always fun to dress up and look your best, and classy people know this, they don’t try to dress in a way that makes them seem like they have power and money. This feels gaudy for them, and it screams of trying too hard. Rather than seeking validation through ostentatious displays of wealth, they’ll choose clothing that speaks to their taste, confidence, and individuality. It’s about elegance, not extravagance.
14. Pretending to be someone they’re not
Classy individuals are all about authenticity. They have the self-confidence to embrace who they are, instead of trying to adopt a false persona to impress people or get their validation. It’s all about honesty and transparency. When they live in a way that honors their unique traits, they remain true to themselves — this exudes an air of self-assurance and inner strength that draws people in.
15. Lacking empathy
There are crucial differences between classy people and those trying to appear classy, and a big one is empathy. Classy people are driven by warm connections with other people, so they won’t brush off their feelings or act in a superior way to them. By comparison, people trying to be classy (and not nailing it) will walk around as though they’re the big cheese, and they tend to lack empathy.
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