These days, it seems like everyone shares updates on their lives often thanks to social media.
When we log in to Facebook or Instagram, we’re usually flooded with a ton of news from people we know, many of whom we haven’t spoken to since high school. It puts this immense pressure on us to also share our lives with everyone around us, even though many of the things that we go through truthfully are no one else’s business but our own. In all honestly, there are plenty of things in life that are just better kept between you and, well, yourself.
1. How much money you make at work
Everyone has a different salary depending on their profession and their level of employment within their company. Whether you make six figures or are on minimum wage, it’s really not anyone’s business what numbers are on your paycheck. Sharing your success (or lack thereof) can make others feel uncomfortable, or youmay feel uncomfortable if you’re not making as much as you’d like to be at this point in your life.
2. Who you hate and why
Let’s face it—we all have an enemy or two who we just can’t stand, for whatever reason. Despite how we feel about them, it’s a bad look to go oversharing this and letting other people know you dislike someone, especially if the person you’re speaking to is a friend of that “enemy.” There’s nothing wrong with not liking someone, just don’t wear it all over your face.
3. Your body count
Some people love to play the field, while others are monogamous and relationship people. Knowing this, some people may have higher body counts of who they have slept with throughout their lives, and others could have only slept with their spouse. Whatever your number is, that’s your business. No one has to know you’ve slept with more people than you can count on one hand—why should they care anyway?
4. Your family problems
Families are all crazy and problematic in their own ways, and no family is truly perfect. While you probably have some stuff going on with your parents or your siblings, it’s not anyone else’s business as to what that drama is all about. You may be stressed, but venting can only make things worse. You never want someone to throw it in your face later on.
5. Your marital/relationship problems
On top of your family drama, you definitely don’t owe anyone the story of why you’re fighting with your spouse or your partner. That’s one thing you want to keep close to your chest. Sometimes, when we overshare, people begin to develop their own beliefs and feelings of anger towards your partner, and you never want that to linger once things are all good again.
6. Any secrets your friends have shared with you
If someone has opened up to you and confided in you, the last thing you should do is spill their secrets to someone else. Even if you think it could help, it is a huge invasion of trust and that person may never want to confide in you again. Secrets should stay secret—unless someone is in danger.
7. Why you and your ex broke up
Relationships don’t always last. Some end simply because couples outgrow each other, while others end for a specific reason. In any case, that reason is no one else’s business but yours and your ex’s. You don’t have to go around and tell everyone the nitty-gritty details of how it all went down. In fact, it may be harder to cope and move on if you keep bringing it up.
8. The things you’re insecure about
Many of us have insecurities about ourselves, from our looks to our personalities. While we may look in the mirror and wish we could change things, we don’t have to tell other people what we dislike about ourselves. If you magnify your insecurities, other people may magnify them, too.
9. Why you’re unhappy
Not everyone is where they want to be in life and sometimes we find ourselves in a major rut. That’s okay, and in fact, it’s pretty normal. However, if we share how unhappy we are nonstop, it can make us seem ungrateful for what we have. Sure, you wish you were a homeowner rather than sinking dead money into rent every month, but someone else may think, “At least you have a roof over your head.” We can want more for ourselves, but we shouldn’t spew it to everyone we know.
10. Your mental health issues
Therapy is a savior for many people, Talkspace explains, and today it’s more common than ever to see someone for our mental health. While it’s normal to go through mental health struggles, you don’t owe anyone the explanation or the story of what you’re going through. Work with your therapist and confide in those you feel comfortable with, but don’t feel the need to do so if you don’t want to.
11. Your political opinions
One thing is for sure these days: everyone feels like they are entitled to know who you are voting for. You may have strong political beliefs and ties, but you don’t have to tell anyone if you don’t want to. No one needs to know who you vote for—that’s why voting booths are made private.
12. How you feel about your boss
There is a huge stigma in many workplaces that everyone hates “The Man.” The idea that the boss is the enemy is perpetuated in so many TV shows and movies, it’s no wonder everyone assumes the boss is evil. Your coworkers, however, shouldn’t be privy to if you hate your boss or not. Plus, if you say too much, it may get back to them down the road.
13. Whether or not you want to get married and have children
One thing that everyone seems to ask pretty regularly is whether or not we all want to settle down and start a family. The nuclear family life is so normal for so many people, and if we aren’t there yet, we’re bombarded with questions as to why not. Truthfully, you don’t owe anyone an explanation when it comes to whether or not marriage and kids are in your future. Figuring it out is totally up to you, and only you.
14. If you’re questioning your sexuality
Some people know for sure how they identify, while others may be exploring and curious—both are normal and totally acceptable. If you’re not ready to share your labels (or you prefer to live without them), that’s perfectly okay! In fact, you don’t even have to put a label on yourself if you’re not ready, either. Everything should be happening on your own timeline and you don’t have to share things if you’re not comfortable doing so.
15. Your spiritual beliefs
Religion and spirituality are extremely personal. Many people grow up and develop their own beliefs, separate from those they were raised with by their families. Growing and evolving is part of human nature, we aren’t supposed to stay the same forever. Your beliefs may change and grow as you do, and no one should pressure you into unveiling how they have changed, or if they have changed, period.
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