Although we might assume that some people are born narcissistic, this isn’t always the case. There are some strange and surprising reasons why they might develop symptoms such as lacking empathy, being selfish, and becoming manipulative—and they can start showing up in childhood. Here’s a rundown of 15 possible causes for narcissism.
1. Narcissism can be caused by childhood trauma.
A big contributing factor to narcissistic tendencies is trauma during childhood, studies have found. This can take the form of physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, as well as neglect or abandonment. These harrowing experiences can cause children to become insecure and protect themselves from being hurt by others by closing themselves off to new relationships or boosting their fragile egos with grandiose ideas of themselves as a defense mechanism.
2. Narcissism can be caused by overly positive or negative attention.
A child whose parent is either overwhelmingly critical of them or gives them way too much adoration than is normal can be more vulnerable to developing narcissism. If a child is constantly being belittled, they might grow up to believe that they don’t feel worthy, which could cause them to seek tons of validation from others. By comparison, someone who’s given too much praise as a child could wind up feeling entitled and arrogant. Too much of anything is bad, it seems!
3. Narcissism can be caused by certain personality traits.
Sometimes a narcissist becomes one because they have certain personality traits that make them more likely to develop the disorder. For example, if someone’s competitive from a very early age, this could cause them to engage in toxic competitiveness and gain a superiority complex as adults. Or, if a child constantly needs approval, this could make them obsessed with others’ attention and validation, which is commonly found in narcissism.
4. Narcissism can be caused by parents who don’t validate their children’s feelings.
Another interesting cause of narcissism during childhood is when parents don’t consider or acknowledge their children’s feelings. For example, if a child feels like every time they’re happy or sad their parents brush them off or mock them for feeling that way, this can be damaging. It could cause them to hide their emotions or not know how to deal with others’ feelings, resulting in a lack of empathy and low self-esteem.
5. Narcissism can be caused by childhood bullying.
Even if kids aren’t treated poorly at home, their school experiences could play a role in the development of narcissistic traits. If a child gets horribly bullied at school by their peers, this can be damaging to their self-worth and cause them to protect themselves against abuse in future, such as by keeping their feelings closed off to avoid getting hurt by others.
6. Narcissism can be caused by parents who are emotionally distant.
Parents teach their children how to behave because they lead by example. If they’re closed off emotionally to their children’s needs, this can cause a lack of empathy in them as they grow. They might not understand how to read others’ emotions or know how to deal with them because their parents were always emotionally distant. And, if the parents display narcissistic tendencies, children can easily start adopting these traits too.
7. Narcissism can be caused by genetics.
Some research has found a link between one’s genes and their narcissistic tendencies. Studies have found that the risk of inheriting narcissism can be more than 50 percent, so there’s quite a large genetic risk at play. That said, if someone has a parent who’s narcissistic, this doesn’t necessarily mean that they’ll also develop it, as research still has unanswered questions regarding how much of a role genes play on narcissism.
8. Narcissism can be caused by individualistic cultures.
Interesting research has found that there are more cases of narcissism in cultures that are individualistic, such as those in Western countries. These are cultures in which people are more focused on their goals and needs instead of what’s best for the group in collectivistic cultures, which can be found in regions such as Africa. An individualistic environment can foster selfishness and self-entitlement, while disregarding other people’s needs.
9. Narcissism can be caused by a lack of discipline and boundaries.
If parents let their children do whatever they please, instead of having boundaries, the kids learn that they don’t have to abide by the rules, Verywell Family explains. As they grow into adulthood, this could cause them to feel like the law doesn’t apply to them, making them have an overinflated self-confidence and a sense of entitlement. Narcissists always feel like they’re special and entitled to getting away with breaking the rules.
10. Narcissism can be caused by oxidative stress.
Studies have found that narcissism can be caused by high levels of oxidative stress. This is when the body’s antioxidants and free radicals are out of sync, which can causes illness. Researchers suggest that oxidative stress is linked to how people with narcissistic personality disorder deal with stressful situations. Although they might seem to shut down, they’re actually hypersensitive to stress, proving that there’s a link between one’s emotions and high oxidative stress.
11. Narcissism can be caused by brain structure.
Some research has found that people with narcissism tend to have less gray matter in the empathetic regions of the brain, which results in them lacking empathy when dealing with others. In addition, science has also found that their brains look different, specifically the prefrontal structure which is associated with regulating thoughts and emotions.
12. Narcissism can be caused by physical traits, such as appearance.
Some researchers think that narcissism can develop from traits such as physical attractiveness and athletic ability. They believe the personality disorder originates from physical characteristics that shape one’s psychological development. For example, being physically attractive can make one arrogant or have grandiose ideas about themselves.
13. Narcissism can be caused by being male.
Although not a specific cause, being male is considered a risk factor for the personality disorder. Research has found that men are more likely to be diagnosed with narcissism than women. But why? One theory is that in society men tend to display more assertiveness and power-hungry traits, whereas women are trained from a young age to hide them to avoid being perceived negatively.
14. Narcissism can be caused by parents who don’t help children deal with problems.
While being overly praised or criticized can be risk factors for someone developing narcissistic tendencies, parents could also harm children’s wellbeing by not teaching them to deal with setbacks in life. So, when they grow up, children could struggle to own up to their mistakes, instead blaming others for whatever goes wrong. This is classic narcissistic behavior!
15. Narcissism can be caused by social media.
Although social media has become an important part of many people’s lives, it can potentially cause narcissism. Research has found that children crave the self-promotion enabled by social media because it makes them feel good about themselves. Over time, this can cause them to rely on other people’s approval and praise too much, such as in the form of “likes”, to feel validated. Narcissists are hungry for attention and love because it makes them feel worthy.
