Alright, let’s chat about self-respect. It’s not just about liking yourself or having confidence—according to Verywell Mind, it’s the foundation you need to navigate this wild world. But sometimes, that foundation can get a bit shaky. Here’s a look at some behaviors that might mean someone’s self-respect could use a tune-up.
1. They’re allergic to compliments
When someone pays them a compliment, they don’t just deflect it, they actively try to prove it wrong. “Nice job on that presentation!” is met with a 10-minute monologue about all the ways they messed up. It’s like they’re the defense attorney in the case against their own worth, and they’re gunning for a guilty verdict.
2. They never think they’re good enough
If “not good enough” was a brand, they’d be its star ambassador. They’ve got a talent for finding the flaw in every achievement, the cloud in every silver lining. Got a promotion? They’ll tell you why they don’t really deserve it. Cooked a great meal? They’ll focus on the slightly overcooked edge of one potato.
3. They treat their body like a dumpster
This is about consistently making choices that show a disregard for their physical well-being. Pulling all-nighters for no reason, eating nothing but junk food, or ignoring persistent health issues—it’s like they’re living in an Airbnb they plan to trash before checkout. But here’s the twist: that body is their forever home.
4. They’re in a perpetual state of “almost”
They almost start that project, almost leave that toxic job, almost set that boundary. It’s like they’re stuck in the purgatory of potential, never quite believing they deserve to step into their dreams. They’re the architects of grand plans but never break ground, it’s almost like they think they’re not good enough…oh wait a second, they don’t.
5. They’re more than adaptable
This is about someone who completely changes their personality, opinions, or even their accent depending on who they’re with. It’s like they’re auditioning for the role of “likable person” in every interaction. The thing is, when you’re always playing a part, you forget your own lines.
6. They collect relationships
Quantity over quality is their motto when it comes to relationships. They’ll keep toxic friends around, jump from one romantic partner to another, or maintain superficial connections with everyone they meet. It’s as if they’re afraid that if they stop to curate their relationships, they’ll end up alone. The irony? This often leads to feeling lonelier than ever.
7. They’re kind of a doormat
They let people walk all over them, make a mess of their boundaries, and then thank them for the privilege. It’s like they’re hosting an open house for their life, and everyone’s invited to rearrange the furniture of their self-worth.
8. They’re stuck in a time warp of regret
They replay old blunders, cringe at past faux pas, and marinate in regret like it’s a gourmet sauce. It’s as if they’ve appointed themselves the archivist of their own failures, meticulously cataloging every misstep instead of learning and moving on.
9. They treat self-care like a negotiable
Taking care of themselves? That’s for other people. They wear busyness and self-neglect like badges of honor. “Sleep? Who needs it? I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” they say, as if running themselves into the ground is an Olympic sport and they’re going for gold. Spoiler alert: there’s no medal for burnout.
10. They are pros at people-pleasing
They’ve got a PhD in nodding along, a black belt in agreement, and they’re fluent in the language of “whatever you want.” Their own desires? Those are buried so deep, not even an archaeological dig to find them.
11. Negative self-talk is their favorite station
If their inner monologue was a person, it’d be that mean cheerleader from high school who always had something nasty to say. They’ve got a superpower for turning minor setbacks into major character flaws. Forgot to buy milk? Clearly, they’re a failure at adulting and should just give up now. It’s like they’re writing a diss track about themselves, and it’s always on repeat.
12. They treat their dreams like distant relatives
Their dreams are gathering dust on a shelf labeled “someday,” which is right next to “when I’m worthy” and “if I’m lucky.” They’ve got more excuses than a kid who didn’t do their homework, all to avoid the terrifying possibility of actually going after what they want.
13. They absorb the moods and opinions of others
They’re so tuned into everyone else’s frequencies that they’ve lost the signal to their own emotions. Ask them how they feel, and they’ll give you a weather report on the emotional climate around them, but their own forecast? Perpetually cloudy with a chance of confusion.
14. They’re in a co-dependent relationship with their comfort zone
Their comfort zone isn’t just a place, it’s a long-term committed relationship. They’ve exchanged vows with the familiar and stepping out of this zone? That’s scary. They’ve bubble-wrapped their potential in layers of “what if” and “but what about.”
15. They ghost themselves
They make plans with themselves the way most people make New Year’s resolutions—with great enthusiasm and zero follow-through. “I’ll start that hobby tomorrow,” they say, as tomorrow turns into next week, then next month, then never. They’re standing themselves up more often than a flakey date, leaving their personal growth waiting at the table. According to Psych Central, this may be due to what’s called “completion anxiety.”
