When someone’s pretending to be someone they’re not, it’s pretty hard not to notice—if you’re paying attention. The act might be convincing at first, but eventually, cracks start to show. Whether it’s trying too hard, shifting personalities, or always being “on,” their behavior leaves you wondering what’s real and what’s for show. Let’s get into 13 ways people reveal they’re not as authentic as they’d like you to believe.
1. They’re a Completely Different Person in Every Group
Ever meet someone who seems to have a new personality depending on who they’re with? They’re all business at work, the life of the party with friends, and suddenly reserved with family. It’s not versatility—it’s insecurity. Authentic people stay consistent, no matter the crowd. Pretenders, on the other hand, adapt to whoever they think will like them best. If their vibe shifts like quicksand, chances are you’re seeing a curated version, not the real deal.
2. They’re Obsessed With Being Liked
You know the type… always agreeing, always complimenting, always trying way too hard to be everyone’s favorite. While it might come off as friendly, it’s usually a sign they’re seeking validation from the people around them. Real confidence doesn’t need constant approval. Pretenders, though, will bend over backward to fit in, even if it means losing themselves in the process. When someone’s overly agreeable, it’s not charm—it’s a dead giveaway that they’re trying too hard to impress.
3. They Can’t Handle Criticism
If any hint of constructive feedback makes them defensive, angry, or downright hostile, that’s a huge sign they’re not comfortable in their own skin. Authentic people don’t love criticism, but they can handle it—they know it doesn’t define them. Pretenders, though, see criticism as a threat to their carefully crafted image. Instead of taking it in stride, they overreact, deflect, or try to prove why you’re wrong. That thin skin is a loud alarm that something isn’t real.
4. Their Stories Are Always a Little Too Perfect
If their life sounds like a highlight reel with zero flaws, you’ve got to ask yourself—what’s missing? The answer is probably: the truth. Pretenders love to craft stories where they’re the hero, everything goes right, and struggle is a foreign concept. But real life is messy, and real people don’t shy away from it. When someone’s stories are all sparkle and no depth, it’s not just suspicious—it’s exhausting. People who are comfortable with themselves don’t need to airbrush their reality.
5. They Drop Names Like It’s a Sport
“Oh, I went to dinner with [insert important person here]” or “I worked with [famous name] on this project.” Constant name-dropping is the easiest way to show off. Authentic people don’t need to ride someone else’s coattails to feel valuable—they know their worth stands on its own. Pretenders, though, think that name-dropping adds instant credibility. Instead, it just makes everyone around them roll their eyes. Relationships aren’t resumes—stop trying to flex.
6. They Over-Explain Everything
When someone’s being genuine, they don’t feel the need to justify themselves. Pretenders, however, over-explain every decision, opinion, or story as if they’re trying to convince you (and themselves) that they’re legit. It’s like they’re running a never-ending PR campaign. Real people say what they mean and move on. If someone’s giving you a full-blown PowerPoint presentation on why they did something minor, they’re probably hiding a shaky sense of self behind all those words.
7. They Overcompensate With Flash
When someone’s all about the show—whether it’s designer clothes, the “perfect” Instagram feed, or constant bragging—it screams insecurity. Pretenders think they need to dazzle you to be liked, but it comes off as exhausting instead of impressive. Real people know their value isn’t tied to their image. The more someone overcompensates with flash, the more it feels like they’re distracting you from the parts they don’t want you to see.
8. They’re Always “On”
If someone never has an off moment—always smiling, always performing, always “on top of things”—it’s usually an act. Authentic people let their guard down. They have bad days, awkward moments, and times when they’re just not at their best. Pretenders, though, are scared to let anyone see behind the curtain, so they stay in performance mode 24/7. But no one can keep that up forever, and eventually, the mask starts to slip.
9. They Struggle to Be Vulnerable
Vulnerability is scary, but it’s also what makes people real. If someone never opens up about their fears, struggles, or emotions, it’s a sign they’re hiding. Pretenders don’t want to risk being seen as weak or imperfect, so they keep everything surface-level. But relationships require depth, and without vulnerability, there’s no real connection. If someone dodges every personal question or avoids emotional conversations, it’s clear they’re not ready to be authentic.
10. They Love the Sound of Their Own Voice
Pretenders tend to dominate conversations. They’ll talk endlessly about their achievements, opinions, or plans but rarely pause to ask about you. It’s not just self-absorption—it’s insecurity. They think if they can keep the spotlight on themselves, no one will notice the cracks in their story. Authentic people, on the other hand, value connection. They listen, ask questions, and engage with others. If someone’s all talk and no curiosity, it’s a red flag.
11. They Can’t Keep Their Stories Straight
When someone’s pretending, the details don’t always add up. They forget what they told you last week, contradict themselves, or change their version depending on who’s listening. It’s hard to keep track of lies, and eventually, the cracks start to show. Authentic people don’t have to remember which version of themselves they presented—they’re just consistent. If someone’s stories always seem to shift, it’s because they’re not rooted in truth.
12. They Mirror You Too Much
It’s normal to connect with people over shared interests, but when someone mirrors everything you say or do, it feels… off. Pretenders mimic others to gain approval, adopting opinions, hobbies, or even mannerisms that don’t match who they really are. Authenticity comes from being yourself, even when it doesn’t perfectly align with everyone else. If someone’s trying too hard to “be like you,” it’s a sign they’re struggling to be themselves.
13. Being Around Them Feels Like Work
Pretending takes so much effort, and you can feel it. Authentic people are easy to be around because they’re comfortable in their own skin. Pretenders, on the other hand, create tension. Whether it’s their constant need to impress or the energy it takes to keep up their act, being with them feels draining. If you leave an interaction feeling exhausted, it’s because you weren’t connecting with the real person—they were too busy putting on a show.
This content was created by a real person with the assistance of AI.
